I remember visiting our friends Kandi and Von while we were expecting Ruby. They had just brought home their second child and watching them work the house and family was like watching this well oiled machine. There was one moment specifically when Kandi bundled the newborn so tightly and perfectly that the swaddle could function almost as a portable baby carrier. I hadn't swaddled a baby since I stopped playing with dolls. (And in fact, while in the hospital we had to ask a nurse twice to show us how to both swaddle the baby and properly burp her.) In hindsight, and as a parent now myself, I am sure they felt they were barely pulling it off. But from my vantage point, they did no wrong and I wondered if I could manage half as well with one.
Now, expecting number two, I am yet again overwhelmed. I lie in bed sleepless at night fretting over multiple scenarios, completely aware of my ineptitude and the fact that I still couldn't swaddle a baby with the skill I long ago witnessed. I deal with stress such as this by absorbing as much information as possible. I now, to my great horror, like to read parenting magazines and Babycenter.com. And while I know a lot of people don't advocate reading parenting literature, when you don't leave near any family and there is a vast time difference between you and a sibling with four children, you need to rely on the knowledge in your bookshelves a little more heavily than you otherwise might.
So, today's question is for anyone out there who knows of parenting literature that is exceptionally helpful. And I already know about the "What to Expect" books. Are there books you found invaluable? Books you would say to stear clear of?
PS: To those still wondering what we are having, we don't know yet...sometime in December maybe?
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6 comments:
and when are you expecting? Is the baby going to be born in Sri Lanka? How's there medical care? Just curious.
Oh gosh, parenting advice... I"m out.
But have you seen the Atlantic Monthly? The cover story is about your boy Obama.
:)
Um, we have finally decided on a name so I feel like we're all set for baby #2. It is a false sense of everything, but my plan at this point is just to roll with whatever comes - maybe not the best strategy, but I found that with Caleb several things I "planned" to do just didn't work and I was disappointed. My parenting approach this time is no expectations = no disappointments. Ridiculous, but that's all I've got. If you get any great advice from someone much more experienced than us, send it my way, clearly I could use the help.
There is a sleeping book that I really liked, but I can't remember the name...I think Healthy Habits, Healthy Baby...something like that. I borrowed it from Renee. And I read The Baby Whisperer the 2nd book and it was a little helpful, but I dont think I would ever read it again. My copy is missing in action...somewhere on the floor of the US Embassy in Paris or the NY airport. But good riddance to that. And finally, when I wanted to know anything about babies, etc., I posted or searched on the MESSAGE forum. It was a lifesaver, but I only had one kid. Where are you going to have the baby? I hope you get the prime de grossesse and the prime de naissance. Do you have a mutuel? Okay, boring comment, sorry.
Baby is due in April. By the time we are in Sri Lanka, she/he will already be one...so we have some time before then. We are having the baby at the American Hospital in Paris.
And Marlo, what kind of visa did you all come to Paris on? Student? I don't think we are eligible for the prime de naissance, but I am willing to go to the Mairie to find out--but I would like a better understanding before entering into the hole that is French bureaucracy. What is a mutuel? French bank account? I haven't been willing to pay the membership fee to join Message...is your membership still valid? Want to share your password? :):)
I thought I sent a comment on this aleardy but either you didn't like it or it didn't go through.
This is what is on my book shelf:
-ALL the what to expect books (you said that you know about them but do you have them?) They have been my best middle of the night reference books because of the illness section in the back
-Siblings Without Rivalry-Faber(Sometimes I lock myself in my room and reread this when I am at my wit's end)
-Christlike Parenting-Latham (it wouldn't hurt me to re-read this one right now...
-Solve your Child's Sleep Problem-Ferber (boy am I glad I don't need to reread this one right now...)My friend read the Healthy Child... book and her baby that was keeping her up all at night sleeps like a champ now.
As far as what not to read there is one book that Byron has been trying to to get Daph to read and I don't know the name of it but whatever it is I am sure it SUCKS!
Good luck!
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